Wednesday, February 20, 2013

the lesson bittersweet



ill take away
unearned gifts you did not notice
make you appreciate
soon youll miss how fortunate
you used to be before you met me
ill take away until you break

there was a man
born into a life most would envy
gifted with good friends
lots of luck and opportunities

imagine my surprise
when i met the man with everything
his sad ungrateful eyes
watching days pass by in apathy

the man should be shown
errors of his ways
so ill take it upon myself to break

there was a time
when he lived a life of luxury
now a broken man
only fortunes left are memories

now with eyes open
things taken for granted can be seen
the lesson bittersweet
he didnt know what he had till it went missing

ill take, and ill take
ill take everything away
until you break, until you break

Monday, July 30, 2012

the hunt is over


too busy fleeing the scene
to notice they stopped chasing.. after us
here we thought we heard footsteps closing in
all this time our ears had been mistaken

somewhere along the long line
all the lions gave up trying to find
the bushes and caves weve been holed up in
all this time weve been needlessly hiding

adding miles between
ghosts we couldnt see
and the place we call home for the night

retreating further passed
where were supposed to be
when theres no pursuer left in sight

if all the lions
returned to their den
then the hunt is over
so why do we keep running?

moments before we collapse
paranoia makes us think we see traps
hidden all around our exhausted feet
pushing us onward continually

Friday, July 15, 2011

long time no see


i can choose when to
lay my head back
and turn off the lights

i pull down my two
movie projector
screens for the night

but i have no control over
the evil man
with the reels in hand
who chooses scenes
to display on my screens
and im forced to watch them play
until i awake

films from former lives
starring characters
best forgotten

perform before my eyes
scripts that always end
in disappointment

long time no see
may the next time be
twice as far away and half as long

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

islands of me




bags and boxes
line my floor like ocean debris
piles of possessions
old and ragged islands of me

sharks keep moving to breathe
if they stay still too long theyll drown
i fear the same goes for me
ill breathe so much better once i get out of this town

ill take only what i can carry
with forgetful hands and a faulty memory
its time i head for uncharted waters
before this place becomes too familiar

every day i remain
is one less day ill have to explore
the faster i and set sail
the sooner i can say goodbye to this shore

before i sink even lower
before the waves keep me here forever
before monotony drags me under
before this place becomes too familiar

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

nights follow days



and so it begins
with a gift of lilies
freshly cut, full of life
petals just began blooming

vase placed upon
her favorite dresser
sweetly reminding
of the charming new stranger

but the nights follow days
silently trading budding beauty with age
helplessly we can only
watch as the radiance fades.. away

time finds a way
to escape perception
things decay much too slow to
catch our attention

pedals wilt, couples quarrel
feelings taper
all good things eventually
seem to dry up and disappear

watch our radiance fade.. away
watch our youthfulness fade.. away
watch our usefulness fade.. away

Monday, April 25, 2011

ashes are where bridges stood


no need to worry
about throwing stones
if youve already shattered the walls
of glass that once held up your home

no one can hurt you
if they cant come around
because ashes are where bridges stood
before you burned them down to the ground

so cut the anchors
caught up in failures loose
cause when theres nothing
left there is nothing more to lose

nightmares wont haunt you
if you cant fall asleep
because you intentionally try
to forget you place when counting sheep

never disappoint
anyone again
after severing every bond
between you, your lovers, and your friends

may your abandoned anchors rust
burned bridges crumble to dust

Monday, February 28, 2011

the deadly heat

close your eyes
lets pretend
the smoke is like
lovely incense

the fire alarm
it sweetly sings
a lovers tune
not a dire warning

the flames are spreading
down the halls
fast approaching
our bedroom walls

but we'll sit still
and make believe
that we cant feel
the deadly heat

will denial
save us from death
we tell ourselves
we have more time left

the blackened smoke
it stings our eyes
so we keep them shut
and live in our minds

these burns will heal eventually

Thursday, November 18, 2010

a minor


she majored your minor
remade your tone brighter
but her cadence came early
returning you to a darker key

oh, the saddened a minor
longs to hear her sharpened c
punctuate his somber chords

break through the scales
she knew just how resolve
all of his dissonant notes

her reverb still haunts you
faint echoes of a better tune
your minor third cant compete
with her beautiful harmony

her melody used to shape your theme

Thursday, October 28, 2010

learn to enjoy your cage


terrified to fly alone
you decide to clip your weathered wings
fall from the sky like a stone
to see what a more grounded life may bring

try your best to forget
exactly just how good it felt to be free
tell yourself you're better off
with having companionship instead of wings

with no means of escape
comfortably locked away
well i hope for your sake
you can learn to enjoy your cage

terrified to die alone
you hastily make a nest
blindly bind yourself to
the first one who casually happens to say yes

try your best to not regret
replacing your freedom for a piece of mind
tell yourself that your choice
for comfort clearly was the best at the time

Thursday, September 23, 2010

drowning myself


i will drown myself
just to learn how to swim
when i defeat me
i feel what its like to win

never content
in the shallow end
id rather be in over my head

if youre not growing
youre slowly dying
so i will swim till im dead

head beneath the waves
teach my lungs to hold breath
when im blue in the face, ill finally
cherish the air that is left

never content
in the shallow end
id rather be in over my head

if youre not struggling
youre slowly drowning
so i will swim till im dead

i will drown myself just to learn how to swim

Thursday, August 19, 2010

two roads diverged


sleep well my dear
when you wake i wont be near
i chose to follow my head
instead of my heart
and it led away from here

two roads diverged
the second path looked as good as the first
though it may separate us
(i) took the more adventurous
not knowing which way would end worse

trade my slippers for walking shoes
left our warm bed behind
this lonely trail must be pursued
'fore i can rest my troubled mind

gomen nasai
by the time you open your eyes
ill be gone and ashamed
of the man i became
the one who always says goodbye

Monday, June 7, 2010

burn the map



there is no such thing
as starting over
what's done is done

reset buttons
are for consoles
and the naive

there will come a day
when you'll come undone
and realize

everything you sought
turned out not what you wanted
to have all along

burn the map
unlearn the place where x marked the spot
forget the path
with no destination you will never be lost

eventually
you'll probably succeed
but at the end of the level
then you'll discover
she's in another castle

all those precious goals
that you were told
you should aim for

when they're finally achieved
you feel just as empty
as you did before

Sunday, May 2, 2010

the fiend beneath



let me the first to observe
this new leaf you've decided to turn
is just as rotten through and through
wilting from within, just like you

we followed you straight into your web
we swallowed the bait; got caught in your net
you fooled us once but now we know
you're nothing but a demon in angels clothes

let me be the first to attack
your pretty face is only a mask
worn to conceal the ugly truth
i've sworn to reveal the awful you

innocent smile hides deadly teeth
masquerading the fiend beneath
the fiend beneath!

Sunday, March 28, 2010

a final show



lungs filled with bated breath
palms wet with nervous sweat
toes hang off the ledge
eyes clenched to keep the focus

a short life flashes
before tear-soaked eyelids
as a crowd below
is expecting a final show

leaning forward now
at the very edge where
life and death collide
never felt more alive

heart beats harder still
pumping against the will
of a broken mind
defeated for the last time

seconds slow to hours
at the very edge where
life and death collide
never felt more alive

Sunday, February 28, 2010

oh the games we play



brick by brick
we build these walls around
our frightened heads
avoiding the thoughts we dread

to protect us from
each and everyone

oh the games we play
to keep the demons at bay
all the tricks up our sleeves
ready to make our escape
hoping the traps that we set
keep us just a step ahead

inch by inch
we sink further in our shell
retreat within
our homemade prison cell

hoping the traps that we set
keep us just a step ahead
and if were lucky enough
they wont spring on us instead

please protect us from
each and everyone

Monday, December 14, 2009

what fools we are to think we ever were



i was never there
and you were no where to be seen
whatever you think happened
it was all in your imagination

these photographs aren't real
doctored to mislead our memories
conjure emotions we shouldn't feel
create a false illusion

what feels like a familiar pair of eyes
is just misplaced trust in corrupt minds
what fools we are to think we ever were
more than a fleeting whim because
we never could have been

and you may recall nights
spent holding each other so tight
i too suffer similar visions
but know they're just delusions

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

to all of you



to all of you who know me
better than i will ever care to
know myself

help me see through pretenses
set up to mask reasons why i
left my past

have i been running away from myself
or am i still trying to find who i am
in either case
i haven’t a trace
of success yet

no shovel of mine digs this deep
without the right tools, how can i get
to the root

this question needs answering
i don’t have a clue but im hoping you
you do

Monday, August 10, 2009

the wicked current



wave goodbye
as the breeze catches the sails
and the distance grows
as the cruel wind blows
helplessly watch from the shore

empty dock
cues the heart to drop, its heavy
with regret
the last boat has left
jealously watch from the shore

the wicked current current pulls your dreams
further away out to open sea
you missed the boat now its too late
that ship has sailed, she got away

plant your feet in the sand
and try to let go
your hope slowly fades
like receding waves
helplessly watch from the shore

contemplating what would be worse?
dying trying to catch up
or dying alone in a dry grave
haunted by what you gave up

Thursday, June 18, 2009

were not made for clouds



this wont last forever
we will fall down
see the sights while you can
cause you wont from the ground

brace yourself for impact
a matter of time
breathtaking rise followed by
our fateful decline

without wings we wont
always float along
were not made for clouds
well fall before long

remember what its like
our transient ride
and as we descend, at least we
we know that we tried

back to where you belong



dont look back
were still right behind you
were gaining fast
and soon we will find you

so dont stop moving
cause well never stop chasing
until we grab you
and then we will drag you

back, back to where you belong
back to where you came from
we know you wont get very far
we know you cant change who you are

you cant change who you are

we can see
through your disguises
and we wont be fooled by
all of the lies you tell

them, they will fade
and well be right there waiting
until we can grab you
and then we will drag you

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Lyrics: Impress The Millions

carve your name into a tree
scar the world for all to see
mark the map with where to find the key
secure your place in history

prove to future generations
your life meant something to someone
impress the millions after you're dead
your days were spent not wasted

leave behind proof of existence
remind us of your accomplishments
share your thoughts and deepest confessions
be revered for your influence

touch our hearts
shape our minds
dont make this life a waste of time

Lyrics: We Both Knew

my heartless mind always finds an excuse
to replay the last day i saw you

i knew you wouldn't leave
you knew i wouldn't stay

my thoughtless heart pulls apart everything
searching for something more, hidden meanings

we both knew you wouldn't leave
your life behind for me
all your plans already made
and they don't include me

we both knew i had to go
reset and start anew
run away and see the world
and do it without you

i'll do it without you

Lyrics: Freezing

shivering
cold embrace
wish for warmer things

strike a match
the only heat
savor the warmth it brings

freezing
how long can we last
clinging
to our warmer past

call for help
save yourself
no sense in suffering

the flame burnt out
frost bite set in
your pulse is weakening

so quit ignoring it
you’ll kill us both
can’t stand the cold

the passion’s leaving
losing feeling
it’s becoming a routine

our routine

Lyrics: All They See

measure the time you spend
pretending everything is fine

add up the days you waste
convincing everyone you’re okay

all they see are sunny days
not the cold nights between
blinded by the bright sides
the shadows never seen
or maybe they trick themselves
to see the world as it ought to be

watch how the hands of a clock
continue spiraling ’round they won’t stop

robbing you of your life piece by piece
cutting it short like a knife

Lyrics: To All of You

to all of you who know me
better than i will ever care to
know myself

help me see through pretenses
set up to mask reasons why i
left my past

have i been running away from myself
or am i still trying to find who i am
in either case
i haven’t a trace
of success yet

no shovel of mine digs this deep
without the right tools, how can i get
to the root

this question needs answering
i don’t a clue but im hoping you
you do

Sunday, March 30, 2008

I heart music.

In the next 6 weeks I plan on seeing the following amazing bands: Converge, Red Chord, Minus the Bear, The Decemberists, Stephen Brodsky, Piebald, A Wilhelm Scream, Bayside, Cursive, Jimmy Eat World, Dear & the Headlights, Saves the Day, Death Cab for Cutie, Thrice, and Circa Survive.

Oh man, I'm exciting just reading the previous paragraph :)

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Fuck the destination.

A girl who saved my life told me years ago how it's not about the destination - it's about the journey. Being in high school at the time, I couldn't see any truth in it at all. I honestly thought it was just an excuse for the predicament that i was currently in. Over the years though, this phrase found a way to creep over the line of ridiculousness and onto the side of truth. Little by little, year by year, I believe it to be truer than ever before.

Fuck the destination. It is all about the journey. I don't ever want to arrive. I want to forever be in a constant state of arriving. The instant I realize that I've arrived ::crosses fingers:: will be one of the saddest moments of my life.

Never stop. Never settle. Never be satisfied. The shortest distance between two points is a straight line; I aim to find the path with the most bends, twists, and turns.

Monday, March 10, 2008

Checklist for happiness.

Still jogging after midnight in 20 degree weather? 2 miles tonight. Check.
Still trying to expand my mind everyday? Japanese classes, economics books, and J2EE. Check.
Still writing and recording music? I'm actually listening to some new stuff I just recorded right now. Check.
Still staying light on the feet and constantly moving? I've lived in 2 cities this year alone. Check.
Still exploring the world? Just got back from Montreal and I'm going to DC in 3 weeks. Check.

Life doesn't get any better than this.

Montreal

Montreal was a blast. Even though the weather was a bit extreme (the ever-cruel Mother Nature decided to unleash 55 mph winds while dumping 11 inches of snow on us at the same time), it only made the trip THAT much more unique. I got to hang out in a French microbrewery, a French punk bar, and a French cafe that made amazing coffee at 2 in the morning. Now I can't wait to go back.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

I am the Better Police.

I am the Better Police. I'm constantly on the look-out for occasions where I am not doing anything to better myself. And when I catch myself, I flip out and quickly try to "fix" the situation. Be it learning a new language, practicing the guitar more, exploring new places, exercising more, etc. I've been policing myself into doing these things with more and more vigor lately. It's not that I need to keep busy anymore. It's that I need to keep busy by bettering myself. And boy have I been doing a bang-up job lately. The Better Police are in full force these days.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

I must admit.

I must admit I love this city.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Japanese classes.

Yesterday was my last class of Japanese I - which gives me exactly one week to rest my cluttered mind before I start the next one, Japanese II. I have no clue why I'm taking these classes. Maybe I'll visit soon. Hmmmmmm.. maybe I'll even move there someday..

Friday, February 1, 2008

A step in the right direction.

Looks like I'm moving again. In the next two weeks I'll be packing up all my stuff (read: just a couple of suitcases, some books, and a guitar) and moving them across the Charles to Cambridge. The best part about Central Square is that it has so much more character than my last place in South End. Of course, some people might read "more character" as "more homeless people" or "dirtier," but I'm actually looking forward to this change of pace. It'll be something different, which is always a step in the right direction.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Recording.

I've been recording some of my music as of late. One of the problems I keep coming up against is that I do not like the sound of my own voice. But I'm trying to get better - both my voice and my opinion of it. So who knows? Maybe someday soon I'll have something to show for my years of song writing..

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Snow : Boston :: Chocolate : Cake

I suppose it can get a little cold here every once in a while..


Snow : Boston :: Chocolate : Cake

:)

Saturday, January 5, 2008

gg 2007... gg!

2007, I can't complain about you too much. You gave me a lot of new experiences. I 'm definitely hoping that 2008 can one-up you though..

__2007__
* learned how to sail (officially a seaman)
* learned how to surf (thanks bug)
* learned how to ice skate
* saw the 1st game of the world series (go Sox!!)
* bought my first suits (and wore them well)
* saw several states for the first time: New York, Pennsylvania, New Hampshire, Massachusetts
* turned vegetarian (for the heck of it)
* started snowboarding again (after years of neglect)
* went apple-picking for the 1st time
* lived in a hotel for a few weeks
* changed my "permanent" address 3 times
* worked for 4 different companies
* experienced Salem on Halloween
* applied to prestigious out-of-my-[ivy]-league schools that would be crazy to accept me: MIT, Harvard, Northeastern
* traveled so much that, by my count, I sat waiting in airports on 22 different occasions (booo for airports..)

gg 2007... gg!

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

When life hands you lemons..

When life hands you lemons.. eh hem.. I mean.. When life hands you bitter icy-cold weather, you make a fun outdoor activity out of it. Last night I went ice skating for the first time in my life. Come to think of it, last night might have been the first time I've ever seen an iced-over pond as well. Truth be told, I had a blast. Way to go, hand-numbingly cold weather! You've made me smile yet again! Cold weather: 0; Me: 2.

Friday, November 30, 2007

Another adventure.

New York city, here I come. This will be the first time I get to see Chuck Ragan perform too. It better blow my mind. Another adventure. You better be ready for me this time.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

A million character flaws.

Writing positive things about myself has got to be one of the hardest tasks I've been faced with lately. I can think of a million character flaws. A million things I've done wrong in my life. A million reasons why colleges should immediately reject my applications. But that's not what they want to hear; they want to hear the "good" stuff. The "positive" stuff. Damn you, colleges, for forcing me to analyze my life with a fine-toothed comb, pull out only the good things I've done, and make me sit down and write about it in a reflective-yet-professional manner.

I could have been done with these essays hours ago...

Saturday, November 10, 2007

When the high is in the low 40's..

When the high is in the low 40's, it's only the beginning of November, and you catch yourself smiling when you walk outside still, you start to question your own sanity.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

I'm really good at complaining.

Applying for grad. school has slowly taken over my life. My time is split between (1) questioning why I'm putting myself through this kind of torture, (2) trying to convince myself that Ivy League universities would actually accept a UNLV slacker like me, and (3) figuring out how to get through this maze they call the admissions process. Essays, letters of recommendation, statements of purpose, 10-page applications, transcripts, and the GRE's (again). And that's just for one school; I'm hoping to apply to 4 or 5. A certain university which particularly enjoys torturing their applicants requires that I list each and every textbook I ever used in college. WTF mate?

One thing I've realized about myself while going through this process is that I'm really good at complaining.

Friday, October 26, 2007

The World Series

Yeah. I went. It was wicked. And yes, I paid way too much for my tickets. But you know what? It was a chance of a lifetime and I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Game 1 of the World Series 2007; 13 to 1. Go Sox!

Monday, October 15, 2007

Tour guide.

It's hard being a tour guide when you've only lived in a city for three months. But for the last two weekends, thats what I've been. Hope I did well. Thank you so much for coming out and visiting me; I had so much fun.

I am a Nokian.

As strange as it sounds, I now work for Nokia. And yes, my mind has been blown. Three months ago I took a job here in Boston for a small start-up company that specializes in mobile media. And well, as everyone in a start-up hopes for, we got acquired by a huge company for a large sum of money. It became official last week. I am now a Nokian.

A challenge. A story.

I came out here looking for a challenge. I wanted an adventure full of difficult obstacles and deep pitfalls. Perils and tragedies. Trials and tribulations. A city where I don't know anyone. A city where no one knows or even cares who I am.

And its been hard. Real hard. I lost more than I bargained for. But out of the smoking embers, I hope to someday pick myself up again. Emerge victorious. This might even be an accomplishment I could be proud of.

I came out here looking for a challenge. I'll leave here with the story of a lifetime.

Friday, September 28, 2007

A wicked cold

I've had so many "firsts" since I moved here to Boston. My first Sox game.. my first clam chowder.. my first East Coast beach.. the list could go on and on. One first I was not looking forward to was my first East Coast cold. And boy is it wicked.

Saturday, September 22, 2007

This is the street I live on - I get to see this type of East Coast beauty every time I walk to and from work.



And this is what my building looks like. Nothing spectacular really. But it does have the red-brick exterior, which is pretty sweet IMO.

Saturday, September 8, 2007

The relationship between adventures and my happiness

My sadness is inversely proportional to the number of adventures I'm having per week.

sadness = 1 / adventures

dancing : girls : : adventures : me

if adventure then happy
adventure
therefore, happy (by way of Modus Ponens)

Hampton Beach

Hampton Beach was amazing. Way to go, New Hampshire. You've made me take back most of the bad things I've said about East Coast beaches. Ha, I guess not ALL of them are completes wastes of time and space.

Monday, September 3, 2007

The city of brotherly love

Philly was good to me this weekend. But it just wasn't quite as amazing as I've heard from so many friends and family. Don't get me wrong - I think everyone should go see it at least once - just don't expect too much of it. Do see Elfreth's Alley, the Philadelphia Museum of Art, South Street, and the Independence Hall. Don't waste your time checking out the Liberty Bell. And, when you do visit the city, make sure to bring your nose plugs - most streets rival New York in terms of thick putrid sewer smells.

States outnumber countries

Last weekend marked a significant point in the battle of states vs. countries - that is, the number of states[1] I've visited has finally surpassed the number of countries[2] I've been to. The current score is 16-14, states.

[1] States: Arizona, California, Colorado, Hawaii, Idaho, Massachusetts, Montana, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Mexico, New York, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Texas, Washington, and Wyoming.
[2] Countries: Austria, Belgium, Canada, France, Germany, Italy, Japan, Mexico, The Netherlands, Prague, Spain, Switzerland, UK, and the USA.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Less sand, sun, and Fahrenheit

The beaches out here don't have anything on the West Coast beaches. At all. What a bummer. Imagine your favorite patch of Cali sand. Add some rocks. Subtract some sun. And divide the temperature of the water by 2. But I guess that could be said about the East Coast in general: less sand, sun, and Fahrenheit.

My first Boston show

My first Boston show was an absolute blast. Three amazing bands (Mae, As Tall As Lions, and Dear And the Headlights), a packed underground venue (literally), some new friends that love talking about bands and music, and a crowd that can't say "no" to clapping. It made me go home smiling.

Selfishness

Please forgive me for my latest act of pure selfishness. This Boston thing was not for anyone else but me. 100% me. I left everyone and everything that meant anything to me high and dry in the Vegas desert. And as I continue this act of self indulgence, please keep in mind that I still miss my Vegas friends, my Vegas family, and my Vegas life every freaking day.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Salem, Ma. sold its soul to the devil

I spent all day in Salem Massachusetts yesterday. After a quick ferry ride up the coast, I began my exploration of the small city. I started the day with a few museums (the Peabody Essex Museum and the Salem Witch Museum) and ended it with a short walk down Chestnut Street (known for its 200+ year old houses). Overall, it was a good experience. But I couldn't quite shake the feeling that the city was playing the witch angle just a little too much. Maybe it was the multiple haunted houses that run year-round. Or maybe it was all the souvenir shops filled to the brim with images of women riding broomsticks and men with glowing red eyes and horns on top of their heads. Maybe it was the nagging feeling that Salem Ma. sold its soul to the devil. I think I could have learned more REAL history about the Salem Witch Trials by spending just a few minutes on Wikipedia. Nevertheless, I'm glad I went there. At the very least, it was good to have an excuse to get out of the house.

These things look good on paper

Yes, these things look good on paper. They probably sound good when you read them off of a computer screen too. They're the kind of things that people always want to be able to say about their own lives. Yes, I've got a good job. I live in an interesting section of an amazing city. I'm constantly surrounded by culture, style, and history.

The only beast I've had to battle since I've gotten up here is myself. And hopefully, if I ever end up winning this fight, I might even be able to convince myself that these great things are enough to make even me happy.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Back to my roots

I love being busy as hell. The kind of busy where I don't have any extra time to myself. The kind of busy where I don't have time to think. About anything. Ever.

I made it a personal goal of mine to become this busy the last few months I lived in Vegas. And it was phenomenal. It was so easy to pull off - what with planning a new life in a new city and all. But now that every thing's starting to settle down, I've caught myself slacking off on the job a few times. And that frankly will not fly.

The good news is that I'm back on course and wicked busy again. No relaxing. No free time. And screw sleep - I've got better things to do. Back to my roots.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

A normal workday

A normal workday for me consists of waking up around 7:30am to, as it has been since August of last year, a song called "Damn it Feels Good to be a Gangsta." And it sure does. [Editor's note: I know it sounds corny, but thats what makes it so ridiculously funny to me!] After a quick 16-minute iPod-infused walk to work, I begin playing with cellphones, building websites for them, and other miscellaneous nerdy things. If it's a Friday, there will probably be a beer intermission around 3pm. After work I'll probably end up either hanging out with coworkers at a couple of bars, exploring Boston on foot by myself, catching up my social life online or by phone, or reading the newest Harry Potter book. Sleep tends to come late for me - I'll usually let myself fall asleep around 1 or 2am. Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

The apartment

I finally moved into an apartment today. I now live in an area of town called "South End," which is known as the artsy section of Boston. I already found a place that has live jazz every night at 10pm that is literally a couple blocks from my place. My roommate is a tall, skinny, friendly Trinidadian who travels a lot. I've already relocated my life (the one that fits into just two suitcases and a guitar case) to my new place, but now I have to do the boring task of buying home-type stuff: Sheets, blankets, towels, food - you know, all the stuff that normal people already own.

I finally have a place to call "home." Now, if only I can make it feel like one..

Sunday, August 5, 2007

Becoming.

My first week of living in a new city is coming to a close, and I'm happy to admit that my mind still gets blown on a daily basis. This place is so different from everything I've ever known. I mean, I'm used to jumping into far-away places and getting used to strange street names and foreign faces - but this time it's so different. This time it's not about watching and interacting with a new culture. Now it's about understanding them and (hopefully) becoming one of them. Emulating. Assimilating. Becoming.

Reading.

Reading is such a big deal here. Everyone reads while commuting to work on the T (that's what they call the subway here). People even read while walking to work. I've concluded that reading in Boston is like listening to NPR or those crappy "Morning Zoo" shows back in Vegas - it's the thing to do when you're between where you want to be and where you have to be everyday. Anyways, I'm doing my part to fit in. I've got my 7th Harry Potter book with me wherever I go. And it's awesome. Yes, I'm a nerd.

Beer Fridays.

I got to enjoy my first "Beer Friday" at work. This weekly event consists of a Friday afternoon at the office plus the delightful bonus of beer, chips, salsa, and cookies. It's such an odd yet comforting feeling to open a beer with your boss, drink it, socialize a bit, and then return to your desk to finish up some last-minute work.

Hella.

Hella. This word comes out of my mouth so easily and effortlessly whenever I feel the need to describe a large quantity of things. Yet, as natural as it sounds to my west-coast ears, it does not sit right in conversations here on the east coast. In fact, this word is guaranteed to disrupt conversations, turn heads, and make everyone around you question where you're from. For the most part, I've been good at avoiding this word as much as possible. Unfortunately, I found out that alcohol does to me and my control over this word as what kryptonite does to superman and his superpowers.

So I was out at the bar with hella (oops) coworkers, making friends and telling stories. You know how I do. When all of a sudden, this word starts flying out of my mouth more often than Jon Losey spelling supercalifragilisticexpialidocious when he's drunk. Damn you Newcastle! Damn you for creating awkward situations where everyone stops talking and asks where I'm from!

And on a side note, I started drinking Newcastle to remind myself of all the great friends I have back home.

I live in a hotel.

I live in a hotel. This bit of information makes some people laugh and some people feel bad for me. Personally, I think it makes my Boston adventure THAT much more adventurous. So who cares if I don't have a permanent place to live? Or a legal address to give to the Massachusetts government? Or a place I can call "home?" My Boston story sounds so much more exciting this way anyways. And I wouldn't have it any other way.